I feel tad melancholic. It's the time of the year where its always raining and flooding.
In colder countries, its winter.
Snow isn't much fun after sometime. A long snowy season without Christmas is just like Narnia before the four children wander into the world of wardrobe. Sadness, and nothing to look forward to.
My dad once told me old people often get sick in autumn and die during winter. Not only because the weather is chilly, the weather also imposes a melancholic atmosphere to some extend. Its all white, no flowers and trees bare. The animals are off to hibernate. Homeless people on the streets in rags shivering to the unfavored coldness.
That leaves the people with warm families and friends who live in big houses, they have a Christmas party with turkey and wine. And dancing and lightings and music. Big fancy Christmas trees with presents waiting to be opened.
In Malaysia of course there's no signs of snow unless the climate change issue goes terribly wrong or the earth happens to orbit with the equators as the poles instead. We normally have rain and flood this time of the year. 2 years back the flood was terrible. I remember sitting at Yi Th'ng's house with Fann in the morning. Looking out the window, helpless. It was storming and floods everywhere. Good thing her house was on a steep slope. We were getting scolding for every step we took, and people turning backs on us, parents, what a dreadful December.
3 years back I remember failing my Grade 6 piano examination with no feelings. My Penang St. John friend was sitting outside my exam hall reading her Form 3 Sejarah book instead of praying for me to pass the exam. I came out of the hall and heartlessly said, don't worry i'll fail it. My words were very true indeed. Anyway I made my way in as a number 5 into the cadet team. There was no more chatting on the telephone with Pehyee ranting about how my cousin chats with her friend on a long distance call and my obsession with Orlando Bloom and Lord of the Rings like in the form 1 holidays. I was running the field 7 rounds during recess, and 7 at One in the afternoon. We received orders to do this and that as if we are new workers; but yes we were. It was hard times that thought me a great deal and who was the true friend that clings on to you even when you fall down the never ending flights of spiral stairs. I fought hard though. Meeting HuiYen. Plus having Perng calling me a Conventer rudely during a hardcore camp, I knew he didn't meant it but Yi Th'ng told me to fight backXD Eating tauhu goreng with the same people everyday. Running up the slopes of Convent as if dogs were chasing us right after lunch. I always ask myself, how would feel to be a year ahead from now?
And I thought that I was really weird when I was a freshman. How I would run out of neoprint machines when the camera goes 3,2,1 to reading Hardy Boys series in a secluded corner. And marching for the sports house everyday from 7.20am to 1.00.pm. I guess I was still revolving in my primary school world. The school band. The shiny golden trumpet with drums accompanying. Flag day during rainy days and my umbrella breaking in the public bus with seniors bringing us to an unfamiliar place with no handphone and RM3 in our pockets. And I would rather do a thousand push-ups than doing something stupid for the seniors during camp.
Sophomore me was a noisy kid, talking only to my 4 friends. Singing in choir just for the heck of it.
Form 4 passed by with Yi Th'ng and and PekShan and me sitting at the last row, with the door right behind us. Could sneak in and out anytime we wanted without anyone noticing and with our caring friends covering up for us so nicely. Sleeping and eating and playing matches in Mrs Ignatius's classes. Running to the computer room in 5 seconds for board-lepak-meetings almost every recess after we've taken office for our term. Fann searching for money and file everywhere. Crying once over unfinished secretary work. Going crazy with classical prodigies when Fann recovered from her failure. Always compromising with Cal and Pehyee our recess times. Running into class with sweat all over and telling peckshan how badly Terrenganu did but won over us. Organizing many events like we're professional event managers with qualifications. Having cadets line up in neat lines with just a blow of the whistle. Reprimanding other cadets from all over JB with KKBeh and gangXD watching stupid guys climb over each other to fix a broken lamp. Watching the night sky in a school seeing meteors raining the night there was no electricity. 20 over people sleeping on concrete floors in front of a school entrance. Watching blind love happening. Killing our nerves.
Form 5 bore me with classroom stuff everyday which I never finished even until this day. I only remember juniors biting our nerves till some snapped. Random sleepovers with Bio books at the foot of our beds. But catching up with good friends was a good feeling. Probably my first time in Convent, making friends with every single person in the class.
I guess this time I'm feeling melancholic, is the sense of nostalgia.
That was 10% of the whole thing.
So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen goodbye.